Confined

In the past several weeks I have gone through Numero Uno to Numero Cuatro.  Meanwhile, there have been several guys that I have spoken to or text with.  And, in the end, I am feeling oh so worn out by the prospects set in place.

No, I don't want to talk about "if we're together long enough, you'll see..."  We're not even together yet.  Let's find out what we really think of each other first before planning a weekend in September.

No, I don't want to keep setting phone dates.  I don't like to plan my life around a phone call.  Call me if you're going to call me.  If I'm not around at the exact moment you call, I will get back to you.  I do not enjoy (it makes me squirm immensely) having to be ready and by the phone at 8:30pm.  Just call.  If you want to make a date with me, make a date to meet me.  If we were in an actual full-blown relationship, there would be a time and place for setting a time to call.  (I'd be willing to bend on this one if we were at least crazy about one another and knew it.)  If we've never even met in person, I will not plan my life around it.  (Not anymore, at least.)

No, I do not want to have an email-only relationship.  How long should we write back and forth before meeting?  We're both local, dude.

No, I am not thinking about marriage quite yet.  You may be but, again, let's see how we get along first.

No, I do not want to hear a long explanation about what happened in your last relationship.  A quick synopsis is fine.  If you are unable to do it without telling me all about how completely awful she was to you (and getting worked up about it), you're probably not ready to really be back out there yet.  Give me a brief explanation for now.  "We just wanted different things".  Details can come out as we get to know each other.

No, I do not want to date someone without a job who has no intention of getting one.  If your parents are asking you to find one then you probably need to find one.  And you probably need to stop looking for dates instead.

No, I do not believe that sacrificing everything I want out of life for you makes me the perfect woman.  I think it makes me a pushover.

No, I do not particularly want to date someone who's 16 years my senior.  (Unless I met you in real life and just couldn't help myself.)

No, I'm not really sure that I can be attracted to someone who doesn't have a life.  ALWAYS being available kind of freaks me out... where's your social life?  Unless you're new to the area and living alone... I would expect you to have at least a little something going on.

So, after all these things have popped up and shown their faces... I have made a decision.  I am taking a step back.  A few steps back.  Am I keeping my profiles up?  Sure.  Am I answering everyone that I have been?  No.  While I haven't been responding to most of the people who hit me up... for nearly every one, for one reason or another, I have stretched myself out without much excitement.  Meanwhile, my life has not been staying even keel.  I've lost track of me a bit.  Not completely but somewhat. 

I'm going back to just simply keep trying to be the best me I can be.  I have to admit I was having alot more fun when that was my main focus.  And, the truth is, that's the kind of guy I need and want too.  Someone who's just trying to live the best life they can with what they've got... plan for the future but live for today.    And call me when you have a chance, I'll do the same.  The fact of the matter is, I am more of a free spirit than what these guys are asking for.  Which I make very clear in my profiles.  I may not be the most free of the free spirits out there but please don't try to put me in a box from the beginning and figure out if I'm going to be your girlfriend by next week - and then when we can count on settling down after that.  Let's just see how it goes.