Going Out in SJ

So I have got this issue.  I live in South Jersey but I don't really enjoy going out in South Jersey.  I do enjoy the few times yearly when I go out to eat here for, say, South Jersey Restaurant Week... Farm to Fork week... and a couple other few and far between events.  Not too often though - because as a single woman - going out after dinner for a drink or two can lead to the same old vibe, at the same old place, with the same old people, in the same old way.

Last night a couple girlfriends and I went out to dinner at an Italian restaurant (which happens to have one of the hottest men I have ever seen in this area working there - so I will be going there again) for South Jersey Restaurant Week.  We did the usual, we ate and chatted and laughed a bit - we commented on the food, the decor, the man, what's going on in our lives and we got to know each other just a little bit better.  Then one of us went home, feeling tired and ready for bed - while the other two of us were feeling like going out for a few drinks.  She's on the border of becoming single again (it's looking like, at least) and I am single. 

I was particularly dressed up last night.  Wearing an outfit that I was into and feeling pretty confident about and a pair of shoes which make me feel warm and fuzzy all over, I was ready for a night OUT.  What I found however, was a night OUT in South Jersey.  Oh... yeah... I forgot this is why I don't do this very often.  While it's fun to experience the strangeness of running into people you haven't seen in years, ignorant men who actually attempt to unbutton your shirt for you (leading to a quick slap of their hand and a "what the hell do you think you are doing?" from me), language that should only be used with the buddies (at least until you know the girl alot better), being invited back to your place to play beer pong with your girlfriend and yourself (no I am not afraid of being bad at it, I just don't play beer pong anymore... nor do I want to walk into a strange couple's house to play the game - for goodness sake - I'm 31) and ladies - we are not staring at you, we're watching the band directly behind you - get over yourselves for a minute, please.  It's not that everyone here in SJ is exactly the same... the problem is the vibe is usually the same.  And that vibe is the one that chases me away from most bars, most of the time, particularly in the area where I live.  Not too long ago (while snow was on the ground) Spice and I went driving around in my area, trying to figure out where we could go for drinks.  There were a few parking lots that we drove into and out of... none of which I could settle on for us to stay at.  We ended up having a beer at my place then I drove her home.  One reason was simple - I was trying to avoid bumping into people I used to know because I just simply do not usually enjoy seeing them.  The other was just because nothing felt right or like somewhere I wanted to bother with.  

Last night the Redhead and I did end up being happy and having fun - regardless of the weirdness that went on around us.  However - this is an experience that I really do have to keep to seldom, at best.  I often escape to the city that I live closest to, Philadelphia.  And now a big part of me is really beginning to understand why.  It's not that I hate the area in which I live, it's just that I don't like the area in which I live.  I only live there because that's where my job is and where my education is being sought.  I think it's only a mild experiment for me though... I think it might really be time for me to move on as soon as my first degree is had.   

Maybe it's the same everywhere but somehow I do NOT believe that.  Mostly because I have been other places.  It might just be time for me to really figure out where I truly belong because somehow - someway I am becoming more and more positive by the day that my life is not meant to be lived exactly where I am.  There's something else calling to me, something else asking me to come hither.  I have always wanted it and I really feel it's almost time for me to get it.  I just have to figure out my game plan.  Could be bigger and better than I realize or it could simply fizzle out and die.  We'll see, my friends... we'll see.