Inspired and Incomplete

Mojitos and BBQ. Good stuff. Good friends. Good stuff. Last night was good stuff. Pretty much without exception. The only exception being that summer just does not want to show it's face. Or, at least, late spring. Which we are now heading into. It got chilly outside and once we headed in, I grew quickly exhausted and called it an early evening.

We talked about all the general goings ons in our lives and we discussed a mutual friend and her inability to get past or over her past. It's something we all struggle with from time to time, some more than others, of course. I know I've had a hard time reconciling on plenty of occasions and that's my main goal in therapy at the moment. To reconcile my past to my present. To understand that I'm not permanently damaged but, rather, to understand who I am in spite of much of what's been done.

The funny thing about the friend we discussed... she's the one who gave me the idea for therapy. She had started therapy after the past she's simply not over exploded all over her. (And everyone else... I could still hit him for what he did.) I'm not so sure she finished her therapy though. Or if she took the easy way out. Rebounding into a marriage. I hope she is happy, I really do but sadly I don't think that's the case. I never want to end up there. Having something just for the sake of having it, just because everyone else does. I want to have it because it's authentic and real and what I've worked for.