Reconsider

Confusion occurs regularly for me. I'm starting to wonder how well my medication is actually working. I've been pretty compulsive lately. Bouncing around quite a bit, giving in to fits of extreme anxiety at time. But, I don't want to mess with the meds. I'm happy as long as I'm not having racing thoughts and as long as I get to sleep.

Still - I overslept this morning and missed my spiritual direction appointment. I felt terrible when Sister called and I wasn't even close to waking up, though I did answer the phone. I better shoot her an email tonight.

Why did I oversleep? Partially because I didn't want to go and didn't feel motivated to get up. Partially because I drank a little too much last night. Partially because I simply stayed up too late, sharing a drink with someone who surprised me with a late night text. I was already on my way home when my phone's light came on.

Got a random text this morning as well - from someone a little creepier than I'd like to admit. A guy from match whom I had already deleted from my phone memory. "Wish you would reconsider". I gave him no response and his name is no longer in my phone but I know who it was. And I'm glad I never met him - for a myriad of reasons. Not the least of which revolves around "why are you still thinking of me?".