The Seed

“The stupid neither forgive nor forget; the naive forgive and forget; the wise forgive but do not forget.”

- Thomas S. Szasz

The other day I mentioned that if I can laugh about it, I am over it.  Whatever "it" is, it simply slides into the world of eye rolling and joke making.  However - upon further reflection - there will be some things that I may never laugh over but I can still get over.  Some things in life do not ever deserve actual laughter.  Some things do deserve righteous anger but do not deserve hate - once they have passed through the world of feelings and they have come out the other side.  Which, in my mind, is somewhere in the atmosphere - having dissolved into the light. 

Yet, there is a concrete place where things like these live.  They are always in your memory.  Recalled easily but hopefully they are not recalled unwillingly too often.  Everyone has them lodged somewhere in their brain.  Forgive, yes.  Forget, hardly.  At least not for most of us.  Would it be nice to forget?  Maybe but maybe not so much.  One would be doomed to relive experiences again and again and again if we did not remember "what happened last time".  Which is not to say, of course, that many of us do not have to make the same mistakes time and again before we even realize our mistakes.  Sometimes the oops is bad enough to only have to live through it once.  Sometimes you have to repeat the pattern for years before you start to notice that you have been down this road before and it's not in the best of neighborhoods.

Anger is not a bad thing.  It is simply a signal that something in your world is wrong - sometimes very wrong.  Often, we get tangled up in it for too long and that is when it becomes bitterness and, yes, hate.  In my opinion, bitterness is actually a side effect of hate.  When hate stirs too long in the soul, it turns into a generalized bitterness that tastes too much like lemon juice living in your veins.  You become your hate - slowly but surely - it takes over and becomes a very deep part of who you are as a whole.  Do not think that others cannot see it either.  Sometimes they may not be aware of what they are seeing but it's there like a flashing light above your head.

Anger can be good.  Just as a simple seed planted in the ground is good.  There is the hope that new life will grow from it but sometimes that life is not meant to be.  If the seed is tended and watered and cared for... it may grow up big, strong and beautiful.  If the seed is not taken care of - sometimes it grows into something gnarly and sad to look at. Sometimes it grows into nothing at all.  Which way will you let your anger go?  Will you allow it to be the seed of change and eventual beauty or will you allow it to be the seed of nothing worthwhile?  It is totally up to you.