Buon Natale

Christmastime is here. And right about now I can hear the kids from Charlie Brown's Christmas singing those words in my head. It's not so bad. I've still got quite a bit of work to do to before I am ready for Saturday. Saturday is when my family is getting together. Tomorrow is going to be relatively quiet except for the baking I'll be doing for the gathering. My party this year was a bust because of the snow but, luckily, the food won't be going to waste.

This is the first year in several (approximately four, hmm...) that I have felt the Christmas spirit. I actually went out shopping this year. The kids are getting toys instead of savings bonds. I'm hoping that next year I'll be able to get them both. My loved ones will actually have things to unwrap... I haven't felt like bothering with any of it in quite some time. But this year - as I started wrapping up the gifts and getting that backache from being hunched over on the floor, I remembered how much I loved it. How much I used to be thrilled before Christmas. How much I loved Christmas shopping... I mean, actually shopping... walking around the stores until you found something that fits. I missed shopping and didn't even realize it.

I am already planning how I'm going to handle next year. Yet, I still have to take this one in. There is so much work left to do at the moment. Baking, cooking, wrapping... and I scheduled an oil change for Saturday morning before the celebration gets started.

Either way, I'm glad Christmas is back for me. It is a good thing to see the beauty of it instead of feeling the burden. Curiosity does make me ask the question why Christmas has to be so tough when one is going through a tough time... what exactly about the season is so damn depressing? I guess when you are told to be "merry" but it just doesn't feel possible, it just makes it all the worse. Right now I feel like Scrooge coming out his cubby hole.

Buon Natale, people. Buon Natale.